OK, I think it’s time to take down the Christmas decorations at the store. I’m infamous for leaving my tree up at home for months beyond the holidays, but I beat the system this year by not putting up a tree … so the taking-it-down job there is already done. That was easy.

We finally received snow in Sedona! Woo – hoo! No accumulation, but flakes as large as autumn leaves and dinner plates! Late last week, snow fell for about two pre-noon hours. The sun is out today. The sky is inky blue, the temperature 47. It’s jacket weather, no doubt, but I actually have the store door wide open. This is the northern Arizona winter I love: a dusting of snow on Snoopy Rock’s nose and along the upper-most ridges of the red rocks, and a wide beam of sunshine lying on the carpet. (I’m one of those people who like to sit in a sunbeam.)

I caught up with local friends a couple times this past week, once for a “games night,” and once for dinner and what’s-new? chat. On these occasions, there are usually new people in the crowd — a friend of a friend, or a new neighbor — and it was one of these new acquaintances who asked me the most bizarre question about my store that I’ve ever been asked.

First, let me say, I’ve received some bizarre questions. Everyone who works in Sedona receives bizarre questions: “If I wear kokopelli jewelry, will it help me get pregnant?” “Where’s the best place in town to see a UFO?” “Does this bracelet have any special powers?” “Is it safe to visit a vortex site without sunglasses?” And invasive questions, as well: “Where do you live?” “How much did you pay for a place in town?” “What kind of money do you pull-in in a day?” Oh, and I still remember the young fellow who announced that he wasn’t allowed to shake hands with tourists because they’re unclean, then asked me if I was hiring. “Uh … not today.”

But one question at dinner last week moved instantly to the top spot in bizarro: She looked up from her plate, smiled kindly and asked, “Do you sell worms?”

I had to put a napkin over my mouth, I started laughing so hard. OK, I know what she meant. A mutual friend had told her that my Uptown store is named “Sedona Green,” without mentioning that it’s a gallery and gift shop, so this young lady assumed it was a green-living sort of hardware store; and, being a eco-friendly soul, she was interested in composting, which requires special garbage-eating worms. So the question was legit. But it still made me laugh until my abs hurt. I think this could be our new logo: “Sedona Green Gallery — We don’t sell worms.”

Much to do, so I’ll blog more stories for y’all later. Peace.

There’s someone in the shop right now who … I think is going to try to sell me something or tell me about his own art once he works up the nerve. He has that Sedona-artist look: sleepy eyes, untrimmed beard, worn bluejeans with red-rock stains. I look at portfolios on Mondays, but I prefer that artists make an appointment and send me an electronic portfolio ahead of time. He’s looking at random crafts and artwork throughout the store … possibly making mental comparisons between the merchandise and his own work ….

Sedona’s javelina are out and roaming now that the weather is cooling. Well, javelina are always “roaming,” searching for an easy meal, but as the weather cools, more of them come down from the hills and hang out in driveways and backyards. This past week, walking to a friend’s house for “game night,” I stepped right past a small pack of the pig-like rodents in the dark without noticing them. When I reached the porch, my friend pointed them out. They were munching away on something in the moon shadow of a large prickly pear cactus. Unfortunately, My friend’s cat had slipped out the door when she opened it to greet me. Now the cat was missing, and my friend was concerned that the javelina would attack it and eat it. As my friend called into the darkness for her cat, the part of me that wants to be Bear Grylls, urged me to observe the javelina clan from a closer perspective. I approached the javelina very slowly, talking to them as I approached. Javelina have very bad eyesight, and I didn’t want to startle them. I managed to narrow the space between us to as little as five feet before they paused their chewing and glared at me. Snort! Snort! OK, OK, I backed away and let them finish their meal of cactus fruit and cat. (Kidding about the cat.) The cat returned to the house about an hour later, unmolested.

Well, the sleepy artist just exited the store without approaching me. I think he lost his nerve when another customer entered and began talking. Another friend — coincidentally, an artist — told me this week, “We never receive anything without asking,” but I’m not sure I believe that. “I try not to ask anyone for anything,” I replied, and he shrugged his lean shoulders. Different philosophies. I suspect his philosophy is a better success model. But I’m stubborn.

December in Sedona is a best-kept secret. The weather can vary between 35 and 60, but the sun is often full-faced, and the cooler temperatures make perfect weather for hiking some of the challenging trails — just watch out for patches of slippery frost in the shadows. Sedona retailers don’t receive the hoards of shoppers that the big-town malls receive this time of year, so most of us have good sales going, and there’s rarely a need for reservations at even the most popular restaurants.

OK, I really must let you go now. Much to do. Need to photograph lots of items in the store. And here are some random photos, I’ve taken this morning, including one of my backside just for kicks. (The camera accidentally went off, but it made a funny picture.) LOL. Blog more at you soon.

Next Sedona Green blog scheduled for 12/15/08.

This cracked me up: A lady in the store this past weekend asked, “What is the Sedona Vortex? Is it some sort of giant hole with smoke pouring out of it?” Shopkeepers in Sedona receive some sort of vortex question everyday. In a nutshell, here’s how I answer: “Uh … actually … well … there are a lot of perspectives on the vortex. Sedona’s rocks are red because there’s a lot of iron in the rocks, and as the iron weathers, the rocks actually rust, leaving a reddish color that glows in the sunlight and mimics — even exaggerates — the colors of sunset. Some people believe that the increased iron in the landscape also increases the physical magnetism of the area and that this has heath benefits, similar to how some people with arthritis will wear magnetic bracelets to ease their aches and pains. Others believe that specific areas in Sedona radiate so much magnetism — usually areas in which you can place yourself in a position surrounded by towering red rocks — that a “whirling” of magnetism embraces you, and that this “vortex” has health benefits and even helps in decision-making.” I don’t usually mention that some people believe there are crystal cities underneath the rocks built by ancient alien visitors.

Speaking of crystal cities and alien tourists, this surprised me: Last week, a friend mentioned to me that she had a friend who used to work for the CIA, and that his job was to monitor cult activities in Sedona. Note, this is all hearsay, but according to this second-hand information, at one point, there were 42 separate “cults” in Sedona that warranted “monitoring.” Given the literary importance of the number “42″ I suspect this is no coincidence. Hummmm.

Thanksgiving was nice this year. I wasn’t able to get back East to visit with family, but a friend was kind enough to include me — and several other locals without our own turkeys — at the table. After we gave the bird a going-over, six or eight of us played Cranium, a board game that mixes elements of charades, Trivial Pursuit, Name-That-Tune, and Win Lose or Draw. Good times.

On “Black Friday,” Sedona Green Gallery & Gifts hosted Santa Claus. My friend, author Joel M. Andre, donned a Santa Suit and posed for pictures with kids and pets, and a few adults. Andre donated his time to support my store and to support ASPCA (American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals.) I have to admit, I especially enjoyed observing how the kids reacted to Santa. Some were overwhelmed with excitement … others overwhelmed with, well, fear. Either way, it made for memorable photos.

A bonus from spending time with Andre: I truly enjoy conversations with writers, and Andre rekindled my enthusiasm for rolling up my sleeves and getting busy with completing some of my own writing projects. I see a busy new year ahead of me.

Oh, and I can’t end the blog without mentioning the giant seven-foot tall paper Mache snowman so many of you have asked about. Well, my intention was to build a “giant” paper Mache snowman. The process: Using 20-foot long strips of blank newsprint, I wound the paper into ropes, then wound the ropes into ball shapes, similar to how you can make a ball out of rubber bands. This allowed him to be very light-weight, despite the fact that these “balls of paper ropes” ranged in size from a basketball to a bean bag. The result: At one point, the snowman really was seven-feet tall … but the application of warm, wet paper Mache sort of … shrank him up. When I stacked the five “snowball” body segments for painting, he only stood six-feet tall … and he leaned. A lot. He leaned so dramatically, I feared he would collapse over the balcony, so I removed one of his body segments. In the end, he’s only about four-and-a-half feet tall, but he has a lot of girth. And he’s cute … in a freaky, bug-eyed sort of way. He has eyes the size of door-knobs — actually round, black Christmas ornaments that make him resemble the insect creatures in the original Battlestar Galactica pilot. Diane, the UPS Store lady, made him a carrot-shaped, orange, cone nose, and that lessened the “giant insect look.” Finally, I added a handmade scarf and hat by Sharon Herman. Now he looks totally approachable, and tourists can’t resist getting their picture taken with him. (I’ve included pictures of his evolution throughout the blog.)

OK, must get back to running a store. Blog more at you next week.

Next Sedona Green Blog scheduled for 12-8-08

OK, I’ve almost finished decorating the store for Christmas.

NEWS: Santa Clause Is Coming To Uptown Sedona

Bkg: Late last week, my friend, Buffalo Don, mentioned to me that when he was a young man, he used to dress up as Santa Clause during the Christmas season to bring in additional customers and publicity at his grocery stores. He suggested that I try that, and added, “You’re a jolly fellow, I think you’d make a great Santa.” I liked the idea — I’ll try (most) anything once — and I was prepared to serve Santa duty when another local friend, Joel M. Andre, volunteered to do the job for me. Great. That frees me up to man the camera for anyone who wants a photo taken with Santa. Plus, I won’t have to wear an itchy, fake beard. Hey, Joel volunteered! (Thanks Joel!) I think Joel will enjoy it. He’s a young, horror writer with a half dozen novels under his belt, one entitled “Death at The North Pole,” so Joel dressing as Santa will be one of those wonderful ironies life allows.
Anyway here’s the press release details:

Santa Clause Is Coming To Sedona Green Gallery & Gifts in Uptown, Sedona. Friday, Nov. 28th through Wednesday, Dec. 3rd, Noon to 4PM each day, Santa will be at Sedona Green Gallery to hear your Christmas wishes and to pose for photos. Photos may be taken FREE OF CHARGE with your own camera, or Santa’s happy elves will photograph and print your picture with Santa for $5. Additionally, employees at Sedona Green Gallery (with some help from elves) have constructed a seven-foot tall paper Mache snowman which will also make great backdrop for Sedona Holiday photos of the kids.

Sedona Green Gallery & Gifts specializes in arts and crafts made in Sedona by new and emerging artists, and is located at 273 N. Hwy 89A, Suite P, in the Sedona Uptown Mall, directly above Christmas In Sedona. For more information, you may call store manager, … [etc., etc.]

Oh, about that giant paper Mache snowman: He’s not totally built yet. Actually, at this writing, he consists of three enormous balls of newsprint sitting on my kitchen floor. But he will be complete in time for Black Friday … unless something more pressing comes up … which does occasionally happen. The house elf might help if I promise to let him hide a shoe inside the snowman’s head.

Other goings-on: The big event in Sedona last week was a small plane crash. The plane went down just minutes after refueling at the Sedona Airport; crashed in a difficult to access wilderness area off Schnebly Hill Road. Two men were killed, one survived. A New York firefighter vacationing here in Sedona was driving a jeep along Schnebly Hill Road when the plane went down, and he was the first rescuer on the scene –likely saved the pilot’s life. Gotta truly admire folks like that firefighter!

Remember a few weeks back when I mentioned on this blog that estate sales and yard sales were very popular in Northern Arizona. Well, this past week, two people I know held yard sales, and I took an opportunity to visit both. Wow. I had no idea these events were so competitive! On my way to one friend’s sale, I passed five other yard sales in the same neighborhood, all with brightly painted signs urging me off-track from my friend’s sale. Maybe that’s a symptom of Sedona’s current economy. Hummmmmmm.

Holiday card time. Not sure if I’ll send out cards this year. I haven’t designed a card yet, but I need to get on that very quickly if I’m going to do it. Actually, let’s be realistic. Yeah … it’s not going to happen. Sorry. Hopefully next year.

OK, much prep to do and little time. Blog more at you soon.

Today

Been to the Arizona ghost town of Jerome twice since I last blogged.

My favorite quote about Jerome was made by a Sedona friend who wishes to remain anonymous. In speaking about his dislike for the historic, hillside Jerome, he said: “The whole town smells like funky, old beer.” I respectfully disagree, but admit the town does have a certain … spicy-dust smell, similar to what you find in used book stores. But that’s the smell of history … or the rotting skins of unhappy endings.

My second journey to Jerome this week was for karaoke at the Mile High Restaurant with some of my local friends. That’s always a good time, usually followed by getting my butt kicked in eight ball at Paul & Jerry’s Saloon. No difference this time. I lost five games in a row to my buddies, Dennis and Matthew. Also ran into another local writer: Joel M. Andre, nationally known for his off-beat horror novels, such as Death At The North Pole.

Oh, I did another appearance on Allen Elfman’s VisitSedona.TV program on KAZM last week. I think it was my best so far — Allen and I have that back-and-forth-buddy-banter down to a style. Check it out at http://www.visitsedona.tv/ Let’s see if this works … I’ll try to post a link of the segment with my appearance here:

OK, much more going on, but I’m short on time. Blog more at you soon. Really.